Hurry Up and Wait

 5:30 am and we wake up to the phone alarm. We quietly prepare to leave the peaceful holiday property where we have spent several weeks with extended family. The first ferry off the small northern Gulf Island leaves at 7:50 am. You would think we'd be guaranteed to catch it, since it's only a twenty minute drive. The last few years, however,  many people leave their cars in the line up the night before to ensure they catch that first ferry. But, even so, there's no guarantee that everyone will make it. 

6:00 am We're navigating the winding, tree lined road.  A deer on the roadside raises its head as it ponders pronging across the road.  It's early and no other cars are in sight. 

6:25 am We arrive at the ferry terminal, turning left onto the sloped road that leads right down to the ferry. Approximately 30 cars are pulled over on the right shoulder of the road. We are about three or four cars away from boarding certainty. So, I  prepare myself to enjoy the wait until 9:50 am, the next ferry run. 

We miss the ferry by three cars. My son and his family are in front of us, and they miss it, too. Another two hours of waiting. They have three small children. But thankfully, to the two older children, this is an adventure! 

9:50 am We board the small ferry. Yay! 

10:30 am We arrive at the HB Ferry Terminal, disembark and drive for ten minutes to the next ferry. Will there be a long line up again? Yep. We miss the ferry by two cars.  Another hour of waiting..  I stand in line at the little takeout and order a latte. We sit at a picnic table and people watch. 

11:30 amWe board the ferry for the fifteen minute crossing to Vancouver Island. 

11:50 am We arrive in the small town of Campbell River and drive to the local retirement home to have a little visit with my 92 yo mother in law.  She will have been waiting for us for probably an hour. She values being on time! Sure enough, she is sitting outside the building, patiently waiting for us. She meets her 7 month old great grandson for the first time. We take photos. Smile, chat, hugs. Then we are off again. These visits are never long enough, but hubby is returning in a couple of weeks to have a longer visit with her. 

12:30 pm  We hop into our truck and head out of town, taking the inland highway southward. This is not the scenic route. It's the 'get me to the ferry as quick as possible' route. 

We are no longer in Island holiday mode. I can feel the buzz of hurry returning to my body. Now it's a game of constantly checking our phones for ferry updates. Which ferry will we get? Which terminal should we use (there are three on the Island).  

3 pm  As we near Nanaimo, the electronic billboards keep us posted on percentage of filled ferries in the car and truck categories. It looks unlikely we'll make the 3:15 pm ferry. Sure enough, the next possible ferry will be 6:15 pm, but it's almost full, so 8:15 pm  is likely. That could be a five hour ferry wait! The other ferry on the outskirts of town is also close to full. We decide to carry on for a two hour drive to the Victoria terminal.  It offers ferry trips almost every hour in the evening. We consider that it may be our best chance of catching a 6 pm ferry. So, off we go...at least this part of the island is more scenic. 

5 pm We arrive at the Schwartz Bay ferry terminal, and it looks like there's a good chance we will make the 6 pm.

6 pm YES!! We drive onto the ferry! 

8 pm We discuss whether to stay overnight at relatives or carry on for another four hours...   I don't know why we decide it's a good idea to carry on.... "I just want a shower and my own bed", he says. 

12 am After four hours of night driving through busy traffic, myriad of road construction sections, single lanes with lines of traffic cones to navigate,  driving mountain passes, being flashed consistently by the vehicle driver behind us, pulling over on a highway with a very narrow shoulder, and realizing our camper door had opened and was swinging wildly while we were driving 120 km/hour in the dark, thanking this person who persisted in warning us (and thanking God nothing slid out of our camper!!)... after all this, we arrive at home.sweet.home.

12:05 am  He punches in the code to our electronic door lock. Nothing. Nada. The batteries are dead. We can't get in to our home. There is a framed glass door separating us from our bed and shower. No, we don't have a key hidden outside somewhere. Why would we need that?  ;)  

12:15 am We crawl into our camper and our heads hit the pillow. We sleep like logs, dead to the world and this crazy travel day. 

7 am We wake up and decide to mow some lawns and do some weeding while we wait for my son and his family to get home with keys (we live in a suite in their house). I make brunch in the camper. 

1:30 pm The door is unlocked. We are HOME! Home Sweet Home. 

In a perfect world, I'd always take my time getting to and getting home from our destination. I enjoy drives. I enjoy site seeing. But not everyone sees it that way. I'm usually the passenger, not the driver. He likes to just get there already. I get that. 

Nevertheless, I have determined that I will not be traveling for 18 hours straight to get home next year! 

What were we thinking? 

The person who said 'Ruthlessly eliminate hurry from your life' was on to something. (Dallas Willard) 

Book Review: Loving Your Spouse When You Feel Like Walking Away

I've been married over 35 years and still learning how to live together with someone so very different from ... ME! As well, I don't have to look too long and too far to find someone who is struggling or living in a difficult marriage. I'm sure you can say the same.

So, when the book  loving your spouse when you feel like walking away by Gary Chapman became available to review, I ordered it.

 Can I change my spouse? Are misery and divorce the only options in a difficult or broken marriage? Am I a failure because my marriage is a mess?

This is a book that offers hope in situations where one is tempted to give up on their marriage (and with good reason). Chapman lists the myths we often believe, often without even being aware of them. The he counters them with his 'reality living' principles. It takes determination and work, but things can change.

Difficult marriage categories highlighted include abusive, apathetic, and disconnected spouses. These categories include those who are workaholics, depressed, controlling, abusive, unfaithful, and more. If you are struggling, you will probably find encouragement included in these pages.

Chapman gives examples of those whose marriages have turned around and those who haven't. He clearly states that some may need more professional help. The bottom line is that there is HOPE for those who are desperate.

I would highly recommend this book if you want to improve your marriage, whether you've been married one year or fifty years!  As well, it's a great one to pass on to a friend who might be struggling and is feeling very hopeless.Who knows, it may make a world of difference.  In a world where marriages don't often make it, this book really does give hope.

Thanks to Moody Publishers for this free resource in exchange for an honest review.

~Talk~

There's a time to talk and a time to NOT talk.

This morning was a perfect example of when to talk. I called up a friend and we headed out to the Farmer's Market in town. Even though we'd seen each other less than a week ago, we still had so much to talk about! She's a great listener and we have a lot in common, so there's always something to share or discuss. I don't really think we stopped talking since she stepped into my car. We drove downtown,  walked through the Market, headed to our favorite coffeeshop, sat face to face across the table from each other with hot drinks in our hands, and then ambled back to the car and drove back. All the while... talking! It was a nice little time out. Sometimes I don't want to be home alone and this morning was one of those times!

Photo by Juliana Malta on Unsplash

When not to talk?  At the movies! Apparently, also when you're watching a movie at home. Well, that's the opinion of most of my family members. I actually do like to converse during movies watched at home, if the comments are relevant and not unnecessarily distracting. It becomes more of a shared experience, don't you think?  Anyway, a pause button on the remote is there for a reason, isn't it? Sometimes when I don't quite understand what's going on in the movie, I like clarification. But I recently found out my husband really doesn't like to be interrupted  during a movie. He hasn't really told me so before, though. So, I guess I'll hold my questions and observations and just watch the movie next time! Won't he be surprised!

Photo by Grant on Unsplash