Life with Limitations

 We've all learned to live with limitations, it seems, especially in the last year.  Whether we like it or not, limitations have been imposed on us. 

Things are out of our control, life changes, and we attempt to adjust. 

It's been a little over three years since I have limited my diet to only eating low histamine food. Not by choice, but because the alternative involves a very nasty flare up involving rashes and swelling. I've learned to accept this change and, until I have healed from this autoimmune condition, I take it one day at a time and all is mostly well.  

As long as we are home, I'm fine with these limitations. It's when we are asked out to a restaurant, out to someone's home, or with others during seasonal holidays that involve special food, that things get a little more challenging. Actually a lot more, sometimes. 

Like Christmas time, birthdays, and other celebrations. I really miss being able to enjoy some rich, delectable treats like I used to.  Goodbye eggnog, Bailey's, whip cream, chocolate, gluten-full cookies and squares, ice cream cake, cheese and meat platters, leftovers, wine, ...  well, you get the picture. 

Believe it or not, there are some good things that have come out of my struggle with this condition: 

1. I am eating large quantities of vegetables and leafy greens, more than I have ever eaten in my life! My plate really is usually 3/4 vegetables and 1/4 protein (mostly chicken or eggs). This is good for my health! 

2. I have learned to cook up a tasty meal very quickly! 

3. My husband has learned how to cook. Because he (understandably) chose not to change his diet 100% to mine, we decided to try out the fresh food boxes in our area. He now chooses his meals most of the time, and actually prepares them! This is a miracle, folks. 

4. I do not tire of eating vegetables. I've tried some new ones. Surprisingly, I really do actually crave them a lot. I think of the Israelites wandering in the desert for 40 years, and eating a lot of manna, which God miraculously provided for them. But... they did complain after a while.... Oh, some days I do have a pity party. 

5. I often will take a deep whiff of what my husband is cooking, and say "Oh, that smells so yummy". And then I'm back to my plain jane supper (compared to his). Just smelling it does make me feel like I haven't missed out totally. It's weird, but true. Half of our ability to taste is due to our amazing olfactory system, is it not? 

6. My blood pressure is pretty well normal now! I have been on medication for about 10 years, but now I'm pretty well off.  

7. I have learned to be very grateful for both functional medicine and conventional medicine. Sometimes you need both. I don't like to take medication, but if it's giving me my life back, I will. I'm still working on finding the root cause and hopefully healing from this condition.  

8. Our bodies are amazing creations! I'm learning more about the importance of gut health.  Stress can do crazy things to our bodies! 

9. I have experienced the care of friends who go out of their way to make sure there is something for me to eat when I'm at their home (before the lockdown ;)  Even when I let them know I'll bring my own food (which is becoming normal for me), they will insist on preparing food so that I can eat it, too. I'm so grateful for them. 

10. I'm learning more about faith and healing. God works in ways we do not always understand. I believe we can be healed one small step at a time. A lot of time that's how it works, because He cares about more than just giving us what we want when we want it. And sometimes, the answers we hope for never really happen, but we experience His nearness through it all. 

What limitations have you overcome or are learning to accept? 

Five Minute Friday:: Fix

 “I just want this thing fixed!”

How often have you heard this statement? No matter if it’s a car problem, a relationship issue, a chronic health condition, or a world gone crazy,  we just want things to work right again so that we can be on our merry way!

What happens when that ‘thing’ doesn’t get fixed in three easy steps? What if it takes a whole lot more work than we had anticipated and maybe the solution is still a mystery? How do we continue to trust and believe that it will be fixed? How do we react when we think of the possibility that it won’t be fixed?

 I struggle with this one since I do have a chronic health issue for which there is no simple solution. It’s taking a whole lot of personal research time, a good amount of medical and naturopathic visits, money spent on supplements and prescriptions, and  much  battling fear and disappointment. Sometimes it seems there will be no fix after all is said and done. Yet, I still carry on, sometimes actively pursuing health, sometimes resting in the good times, and sometimes questioning again when my symptoms flare.

 How do we live when the healing is not in the now, but in the not yet? I fix my eyes on Jesus, the one who gives me faith to believe. I must come back to the truth that God loves me, no matter what things may look like. And as I continue to do what I can, I come back to trusting the One who knows me best and loves me most - He is my healer.  He has promised to be with me always and forever. I am never alone in my fear and dread. I continue to be grateful for the good times. 

I am looking forward to the time when all will be well! Because one day it will be. 

This post is part of the weekly Five Minute Friday link-up. Feel free to join in!

Photo by Julie Molliver on Unsplash

Five Minute Friday :: Time

 Lately I've been looking through a few family photo albums of past years. That's one way to be reminded that time is ticking on! Snuggling with my grandchildren, I am reminded that the weeks and months move on oh so quickly. From the day I first met my eldest grandchild, to his present age of 3 1/2, I can only say... whaaaat? Where did the time go?

How long is one breath? Breathe in, breathe out.  In God's economy, we are 'but a breath'. But that breath is so valuable! Though our years may be short, compared to the time that the world has been in existence, each of our breaths is so important. God is the One who has breathed His breath into us, and we became living souls. 

Our days are numbered.  Each minute is important.  I have more years behind me than ahead of me, even if I die of old age. That gives me pause. The grains of sand are falling, as time passes.  I am now in my sixth decade, and still I have been feeling that there is so much more I want to do, to be, to experience, to learn! 

May I be grateful in the good times, and trusting in the difficult ones. May I make the most of the time given to me. 

One day at a time. 

Photo by NeONBRAND on Unsplash   

This post is part of the weekly Five Minute Friday link-up! Write for 5 minutes on a selected topic, and share it with others. Feel free to join in!

Five Minute Friday:: ~Grief~

 Good Grief 

At this moment, you may be feeling angry, sad, or perhaps resigned to whatever has caused you pain. Could it be that sometimes you aren't even aware that what you are experiencing is grief? Grief for the way things have been, and the way that this loss has torn that comfort from you. 

We have probably all heard of the five stages of grief, explained by the Kubler Ross model. Did you know that we don't all move through these stages in the same way? 

It's not a linear, tidy step by step process. There are repeats, jumps, loops, and restarts. Some move slowly through these stages, some move very quickly. There is no one timeline that all follow. 

It feels like I have been stuck in the angry stage during this time of increasing Covid measures (again)  longer than I'd care to admit. Acceptance flits by now and then, asking me to follow. But it seems that anger is the sticky stage that's easy for me to wallow in.

 How does one move through these stages in a healthy manner? I suppose it begins by accepting and loving oneself through it. Grief is normal, healthy, and even good. Being honest is the first step to a healthy resolution. However long it takes, be committed to doing the work of grieving.

 And I'm speaking to myself!  

 

Every week, a community of writers of all ages and stages gathers around a single word prompt to freewrite for five minutes flat. Join us! 

Five Minute Friday :: Cancel

A few days ago, your future days on earth were cancelled, the candle of your life snuffed out too soon, it seems to me. My friend of almost forty years, husband to my childhood friend. Your smile, your twinkling eyes, your voice that was always warm and friendly towards me, I will miss these all. Never mind that you were suffering from the effects of cancer medications that were so hard on your body, yet kept you alive for many more years than you would have had. You never dwelled on your own pain when we visited as couples. The four of us visited in each others’ homes, camped together, talked about our kids and grandkids, laughed and reminisced. Remember years ago when cancer hadn’t reared its ugly head yet, we laughed our way through an intense tennis match? I may have wanted to win more badly than you (I think you won ;) That is such a sweet memory. Bob E, I will never forget you and the gift your life was to me, even though we lived a province apart and only really visited once or twice a year in the last 30 years. Rest in peace,dear friend, where sickness and pain have been cancelled forever. . . . This post is part of the Five Minute Friday link-up and you are welcome to join!

~when it's best not to wait~

A few years ago, we enjoyed a wine tour with some friends.   It was one of those days you look back on with fondness.  We hopped into the Tasteful Excursions van and spent a sunny summer day winding up the highway and down little known country roads, being treated to a commentary on the history of the vineyards in our area. Great friends, inspiring views, fabulous wineries, and so much wine tasting! We frivolously picked up this special bottle of  "oak-aged port-like dessert wine" and talked about saving it for New Year's Eve and drinking it with our friends. For some reason, we didn't drink it on December 31st.  Maybe we thought we'd save it for our anniversary, who knows. So it sat in our cupboard for over a year, maybe even two, when I began having some health issues just before Christmas 2017.  Little did I know that alcohol, especially RED WINE would be off limits for me indefinitely, maybe even longer.

It took a few months before a naturopath helped to diagnose my condition, the main symptoms being facial rash and swelling (not fun!). I have what is commonly known as a histamine intolerance. Basically, for some reason, my body isn't doing a good job of ridding itself of histamine, so when I have too much, my symptoms show up. Anyway, I won't go into detail here, but if you want to know more about histamine intolerance and how to heal, check out these two highly recommended websites, Healing Histamine and FactvsFitness.com. The bottom line was to stay away from (quite a long list of) high histamine foods, of which alcohol is one of the main culprits.

Whenever I open the kitchen door to where we keep our alcohol, I see this little bottle back in the corner. And I think to myself,  Why didn't you enjoy it sooner? Why did you wait for the 'perfect' moment? 

This experience reminds me to stop waiting for the BEST time to do something. If it's a good idea in 6 days or 6 weeks, or 6 months, it could be a better idea now.  

So, I'm reminded to:

• Use the fancy dishes more than 3 times a year (even if I have to wash them by hand) because they were a gift to me and they are lovely. One day they'll be sitting in an estate sale in perfect condition and no one will be interested in them. 

• Wear that top I really love more than I normally would because one day it might be ruined or I might not fit it anymore! 

• Go outdoors regularly and get a good walk in because one day I might not be able to walk anymore. 

• Call my mom more regularly because one day she might not be able to answer anymore. 

• Spend regular time enjoying my kids because one day they might move out of town and I'll hardly ever see them. 

• Tell my friends I appreciate them, even if it's not their birthday, because they need to hear it and they're not getting any younger! ;) 

• Spend time pursuing my creative practices because one day my eyes and hands might not work as well!

What about you? What's one thing that might be a better thing to to do right now instead of waiting for the 'perfect moment'?

Book Review: Loving Your Spouse When You Feel Like Walking Away

I've been married over 35 years and still learning how to live together with someone so very different from ... ME! As well, I don't have to look too long and too far to find someone who is struggling or living in a difficult marriage. I'm sure you can say the same.

So, when the book  loving your spouse when you feel like walking away by Gary Chapman became available to review, I ordered it.

 Can I change my spouse? Are misery and divorce the only options in a difficult or broken marriage? Am I a failure because my marriage is a mess?

This is a book that offers hope in situations where one is tempted to give up on their marriage (and with good reason). Chapman lists the myths we often believe, often without even being aware of them. The he counters them with his 'reality living' principles. It takes determination and work, but things can change.

Difficult marriage categories highlighted include abusive, apathetic, and disconnected spouses. These categories include those who are workaholics, depressed, controlling, abusive, unfaithful, and more. If you are struggling, you will probably find encouragement included in these pages.

Chapman gives examples of those whose marriages have turned around and those who haven't. He clearly states that some may need more professional help. The bottom line is that there is HOPE for those who are desperate.

I would highly recommend this book if you want to improve your marriage, whether you've been married one year or fifty years!  As well, it's a great one to pass on to a friend who might be struggling and is feeling very hopeless.Who knows, it may make a world of difference.  In a world where marriages don't often make it, this book really does give hope.

Thanks to Moody Publishers for this free resource in exchange for an honest review.

~Moment~

Day 26 Moment

A life can change in a single moment, and I was freshly reminded of that this past week.

 In our small city there are two main highways which converge at one point and head up a long hill. As I was driving up from the valley this past week in my little Honda Civic, a large one ton pickup truck merged from  the northern highway. I wondered if the driver was aware of my car, as he merged into the lane of the main highway. He proceeded to keep moving into the left lane, intent on passing a slower transport truck in front of him.  I was in his blind spot and he failed to do a shoulder check! I could see him moving closer and closer to me, until he was partly in my lane, right beside me. There was no place for me to go but into the cement median which divides the highway!  

I remember thinking “This is it. This is how I’m going to go”. My instincts kicked in and I leaned on my horn like I was pounding  furiously( one handed) on a drum!  That’s when he suddenly swerved back into his lane. I could feel tears at the back of my eyes. I know how close I was to being in a very serious accident.  I felt relief, fear, and anger all mixed together.

One driver’s moment of inattentiveness could have become the moment  that would usher me into the next life. It made me appreciate my life—I guess there’s a reason I’m still here! Thank you Lord, for your angels of protection!

Nearing the end of the 31 Days of Five Minute Freewrites!  Read more about it here.

Picking up the pieces

This little book of reflections called Winter's Promise by Ken Gire , is so full of gems! Definitely a book to keep and to give as gifts to all your friends haha! Well, especially those who identify with winter seasons in their lives. Or at least those who admit winter IS a season. Life isn't one eternal sunshiny summer, although that does sound nice!

When suffering shatters the carefully kept vase that is our lives, God stoops to pick up the pieces. But he doesn't put them back together as a restoration project patterned after our former selves. Instead, he sifts through  the rubble and selects some of the shards as raw material for another project -- a mosaic that tells the story of redemption.  (p. 83)

Listen

Attention is the rarest and purest form of generosity.
Simone Weil

I've been part of a study group for several weeks now where we are sharing our stories with each other. The rules are to sit, listen, and let each other share what we want to or need to. No judgments, no fixing, no advice, no interrupting. Then we thank each other for sharing the hard parts of our lives.

I wish I could transfer the way I pay attention in this group, to how I listen to my own family and other friends. It seems hard to simply listen. More often than not, I'm partly listening (it might LOOK like I am fully listening) and partly formulating my response to what I'm hearing. But what would it be like to really listen and then pause before I replied?  What would it be like to make it my goal to value the other's words and need to be heard more than valuing my need to be heard, to have my opinions validated, advice accepted, and my needs met?

I messed up again today. I caught myself and did my best to listen and validate.
 "It must be really hard", I said.
"Yes", she replied, "very hard".
I may not have agreed with how she was handling this difficult situation, but if she wasn't asking for advice, it was better for me to simply listen. To be generous by saying nothing.

Not so simple. But so important.

Five Minute Friday: Breathe

Without thinking too much about it, after reading Paula's post,  I decided to take the Five Minute Friday Challenge - writing for 5 minutes on the word of the week, like a freewrite, so no editing allowed! Here goes...

Breathe. 

Just breathe. How many times have I said that to myself? Just breathe. Take a deep breath.

Sometimes circumstances are such that I feel my thoughts spinning or playing over and over like a broken record. Maybe it’s something I said that I regret. Perhaps it’s something I did that I can’t undo. And so I get on this track that’s moving so quickly, I can’t get off. Does that ever happen to you?

Sometimes I just need to take a step back and breathe. Slow my thoughts down and then sit myself down and tell myself the truth. Is this a life or death situation? Is this the end of the world as I know it?  Will I become homeless through these actions? Will I ruin someone’s life? The truth is, it’s uncomfortable, I am sorry I made that decision, and yes, it even hurts a little. Especially when it’s not the first time it’s happened. Big reveal: I’m not perfect. 2^nd Biggest Reveal: And that’s okay. In fact, it’s good. Can you imagine how much pressure there is on having to do everything right ALL THE TIME?

So, after a ‘cool off’ period with myself, somewhat like being penalized in a hockey game (mind you, I have rarely played hockey!), I calm down and it doesn’t seem like such a big deal anymore. What was I all flustered about anyway? It was one little mistake.

And I breathed. 

***

There.. that wasn't so bad ;)

Yes and No

Looking back at the past year has caused me to ponder what I'd like 2017 to look like -- at least the parts that I can control. I know that accountability factors high in successful goals, so maybe I'm setting myself up for failure with some of these! But then I remember my mantra for the year...

I'm saying yes more often to :

• journaling- quotes, devotional/prayer, morning pages, gratitude journal, memoir (however sporadic!)
• reading hard copy books borrowed from the library
• using Overdrive to listen to audio books (free!). I've not been a huge fan of audio books, but I'm giving it another go.
• time for creativity- knitting, watercolor, cardmaking - have enjoyed them all this past year. 
• watching a few good shows on my Ipad -- my little 'zone out' pleasures -  favorites: The Voice, Dancing with the Stars, This is Us, and Nashville (if/when it appears on Netflix). 
• using my YouVersion Bible app.  I tried to get back to using my hard copy Bible, but I always seem to gravitate back to the app more often than not. 
• the Abide prayer app
• GoodReads - a great place to keep track of what I've read and to see what others are recommending. I've set a goal of 25 books this year. Life isn't all about quantity, right?
• personal growth - spiritual - through Freedom Session this year. 
• regular fitness activities, which includes intentional walking and spending time outdoors 
• continuing to go gray... I might add a few highlights to help my hair through the transition, though! This might include another purple, green, or blue streak.. you never know. 
• listening to Spotify playlists. Best $10 a month I've ever spent. 
• listening to podcasts -- all those thought provoking conversations! 
• family time - fun, dinners, and just being there to help out 
• nurturing friendships, practicing hospitality,  and being of service to others 
• eating healthy - more paleo for me and my man
• Instagramming - just because I like it. 

I'm saying no more often to:

• reading too many books at once. This is tough because every time I get a new book, I add it to my already impossibly tall pile of readings-in-progress. I think I'm a bit of a book hoarder - not so much on the shelves, but on my side table! Which leads to...
•  borrowing too many books from the library; must.set.a.limit
• reading books for review. I've realized that it just stressed me out to have to read books on a schedule, especially when I realized I wasn't enjoying them that much. I'm going to pick and choose very few this year. I still LOVE to get books in the mail! 
• doing things out of guilt 
• procrastination. This is going to be very difficult because it's my default! 
• starting too many 'free' online courses.  It just clutters up my brain. Ugh. 
• signing up for too many free online newsletters. 
• subscribing to too many podcasts. 

I see a theme running through my list.. the words 'too many' show up too many times! ;)  Balance. Simplicity. Moderation.
 Keeping my mantra for 2017 in mind, "Always, we begin again", I just may experience some success in sticking to my yes's and no's.

What are you saying yes or no to this year?

THAT Kind of Dad

Growing up in our family, 'Because I said so' was a phrase I don't think I ever heard coming from my dad.

 Because he was THAT kind of dad. 

He was not a dad to fear, although I had a healthy respect for him. And he demonstrated respect for his seven children, too. I think that's what made him such a wonderful dad.  He was a man of few words, but his actions spoke volumes.

Most of my teen years were spent on our small family- owned mushroom farm in the Fraser Valley. Dad wanted our input on what to call this new venture (we chose Meadowview Mushroom Farms) and while my dad and oldest brother ran the farm, all the other older children and my mom helped to make it work, too.

When Dad first bought the farm, he couldn't afford to hire too many people, so we worked A LOT! After school, weekends, and sometimes even during school. Sometimes we worked well into the wee hours of the morning, picking mushrooms at their prime. If not, they would 'open' and be relegated to 'second grade' and we wouldn't be getting top dollar for them. My dad couldn't afford to pay us for our work that first year, but when that second year rolled around, he asked each of us what we would like to have as a thank you for all the help we had given him. I asked for a horse. And I got one.

He was THAT kind of dad. 

When I graduated high school, I decided to work full time for Dad for one year before going on to university. Why wouldn't I want to work for my dad? He was the BEST BOSS EVER. And my mom made our coffee breaks the best, too! (coffee, cookies, and conversation in the kitchen twice a day! )

By that time I had been working part time for several years, and making decent money, too.

He was THAT kind of dad. 

He had hired a crew by then, including a couple of my girlfriends. One day Dad told me he had decided that paying us by the pound, rather than an hourly wage, might be a better way to go and would perhaps increase productivity. My girlfriends and I didn't like that idea one bit, for several reasons. It would increase competition between us (fighting for the most loaded mushroom beds, for one) and take away from the joy of working together. So, we promptly formed a 'union' (in jest), ordered matching bright yellow T shirts with a huge mushroom decal on the front and the words:  I must be a mushroom...everyone keeps me in the dark and feeds me B.S.  It's true! We really did this and my dad got a good laugh out of it. We presented my dad with reasons why getting paid by the lb. wasn't really a good idea at all. And Dad changed his mind. He respected us enough to rescind his decision, even if it might have not been the best financial decision for him. My respect for him just kept growing.

He was THAT kind of dad. 

I have lots of other reasons why my dad is still in the GREATEST DAD EVER league, but this is what came to me as I was thinking about my dad yesterday.

Last week we took a quick trip over to Alberta to see my parents and I got a huge hug from my dear Pops. The drive was worth it :)

What a gift to have THAT kind of dad! 

Book Review: This Is Awkward

I really enjoy authors who  spread a little humour throughout the pages of their books.. the kind of humour that really does make me chuckle and say "Oh, that is so true! I can relate!" Sammy Rhodes, a campus minister,  IS funny. His book This Is Awkward - How Life's Uncomfortable Moments Open the Door to Intimacy and Connection -  is honest and yes, even a little awkward. He lets the reader see his own insecurities, which does make reading it feel a little awkward, but I think in a good way. 

Awkward can mean different things, and Rhodes explains it as "the gap between what we should be and what we actually are. Life is awkward because it doesn't go the way that it should go. People are awkward because they don't do and say and think what they should do and say and think. All of us are awkward because all of us experience this gap in some way." We tend to want to hide our awkwardness (shame), which makes it even more awkward when it shows up. But it is both necessary and freeing to talk about this; this is where we can find connection with others and God.  

Awkward (and sometimes heavy) topics covered in this book include: parent wounds, divorce, porn, depression, marriage expectations, true friendship vs online fame, introversion, and Jesus' love for us (right theology). 

I appreciated Sammy Rhode's transparency about his own life experiences as he wrote this book, including his insecurities about writing a book, journal type entries dispersed throughout.  

This book is relevant for any age, but its target audience is probably primarily young adults. I am going to offer it to my kids and hopefully they will find it worth the read, too.

I received this book for free from BookLook Bloggers in exchange for an honest review. 

Book Review: Farewell Four Waters

Kidnapping was Marie's worst fear. She didn't know treachery was more deadly.

Book recommendation coming up. Farewell Four Waters by Kate McCord (a protective pseudonym), is full of intrigue and emotion. Although security prohibits the telling of her exact story, this novel is drawn from events gathered across Afghanistan over several years.

Marie is an aid worker living in a small town in Afghanistan. Her mission is to set up literacy classes for women.  This riveting story begins with Day 14 and then counts down the days leading to this brave woman's necessary escape from Afghanistan, a place she deeply loved and considered home.

This story is full of many details and excellent descriptions of life in this country  - for both Christian aid workers in NGOs and for the Afghan people. I felt as if I were there every step of the way. Marie, a believer in the "Honorable Jesus Messiah", has a passion for bettering the lives of women in Afghanistan, and with deep respect for their customs and beliefs, she befriends them through loving deeds and conversations.

I especially appreciated her honest struggles related to the events and circumstances she experienced. She incorporated conversation with God through journaling and prayers, not hiding her frustrations and how hard it was to make sense of things at times. Where was Jesus in the middle of all of it?  I also loved learning about this land and culture and what life is like for foreign aid workers.

This book drew me in and it never let up until I finished the last page. It is well worth the read!

I'm really looking forward to reading Kate McCord's first book In the Land of the Blue Burquas. Another book to request at the library!

Thanks to Moody Publishers who sent me this book for free in exchange for an honest review.

A little bit true

Poof! Gone!

Just like the year 2015, my latest published post just up and disappeared on me. Poof! Gone! I still can't figure out what happened there, but suffice it to say, 2016 will be just fine without that post.

I had written about a challenge I had given myself on how to get my 'to read' booklist under control. In a nutshell, I've decided not to purchase any new books in 2016 (except with a gift card, etc). So, I've begun unsubscribing from Kindle ebook deals. It was tough, but sometimes the big guns have to come out. I've got the shakes, but I think I'll be okay. ;)

I made a list of about 21 books I want to complete before I read anything else. These have been set aside for easy access.  In the last two days, I've completed two, so I'm already whittling away.

My fiction to nonfiction ratio is about 2:19, which must be remedied. I need a little more FICTION in my life.  Honey For A Woman's Heart - growing your world through reading great books is a book I already own which I'm planning to refer to once my to-read pile has dwindled.

I'm also going to be ruthless about which books to complete. If it feels like work to get through them, I will add them to my giveaway pile. I feel better already!

Here's to another great year of enjoying and pondering new ideas, old ideas, truths and mysteries, fact and fiction.



Do you have specific reading plans this year? Are you a fiction or non fiction fan?

Reading update 2016

Finished/recommended:
A Tale of Three Kings by Gene Edwards
In Awe of God by Rita Peters

Enjoying:
Two Steps Forward by Sharon Garlough Brown (book 2)
A Circle of Quiet by Madeleine L'Engle
Half the Church by Carolyn Custis James

Next in line: 
Farewell Four Waters by Kate McCord

When Life is a Roller Coaster

Life might be a highway, but it's definitely not a straight stretch of ribbon! It's sometimes more like a roller coaster moving through the dark--sometimes slow, sometimes fast, sometimes high, sometimes low -  don't you think?

One day you wake up with a big smile on your face. Life. Is. Good.

Little, simple things bring you joy.

You received the news you had been waiting for.

You feel good. You have purpose.

All is well in your little world.

In fact, you feel on top of the world.

God is good! you say.

Then you hear that bit of disappointing or confusing news.

Or you read something tragic and scary in your news feed or in your local newspaper.

Or you wonder if your life is making a difference, because it sure doesn't feel like it.

Or your physical health isn't optimum, and productivity is a thing of the past.

Is God still good? you wonder

Or you just seem to be coming up against the same struggles and nothing ever seems to change, even though you have hope and faith.

And you start thinking about the future. Tomorrow and the hundreds upon hundreds of tomorrows which may follow and what they are going to look like. How uncontrollable the future really is.

You read more about horrible events in the world with no quick solutions in sight.

And you worry.

Is God still good? you ponder

Then you receive a hopeful word.

You have the most encouraging time with friends.

Their prayers are being answered!
Your prayers are being answered!

Changes are happening.

And the sun is shining again.

And all seems well with the world.

Isn't God good! you say

And then your heart breaks for your friend, who just shared something hard with you.

And there are no easy fixes.

It's complicated.

Tragedy strikes.

And  personal dreams shatter.

Is God still good? you ask yourself

And there aren't any wise little sayings or pithy quotes that are going to really make a difference.

All you can do is trust, wait and learn to see in the dark.

And believe,

simply (but often not easily)

believe

that

God is always good.

Oh, Lord, I do believe. Help my unbelief. 

For the Win!

Last month I submitted several words on our local library website, describing what my local library means to me. And then promptly forgot about it.

This afternoon, I received a call informing me that I was one of the winners of the Canadian Library Month contest and invited to pick up my prize at the downtown library.

I'll be browsing the aisles of our local Chapters book store soon, with a $25 gift certificate in hand! Should be fun!

It's a Knitterly Kind of Day

 I think Enzo feels the same way. It's the kind of day to stay snug, dry, warm and hunkered down. (In full view of one's person, if at all possible.)

Although I did get out for a quick lunch with a friend (to maintain one's sanity), I have mostly been indoors (working), looking out. It's wet, cool, and grey. Didn't even take The Prince for a walk today.

 I'm looking forward to finishing up these socks, hopefully tonight. I've suffered greatly from SSS with this project.. Second Sock Syndrome is a real thing, you know! And as I picked up this project last week again after a very.long.time (a year?), I remembered why I had dropped it from my to do list. I had made a mistake in the pattern at some point, leaving it one stitch short,  and promptly ignored the socks out of frustration. As well, I realized there was a very good chance I would run out of yarn before the final toe was completed. And I still think that might happen. BUT, this brain has a plan. You'll have to wait and see what that plan is. You see, I don't have any more yarn to add to these socks and I have lost the label and forgotten the name of the yarn. Oh dear, you organized knitters out there must be tsking and shaking your heads collectively right about now. Confession: I am not as organized as I used to be. But, all is not lost. I am determined to complete these socks.
And since today is a knitterly kind of day... I hope to work on that tonight.