Good Grief
At this moment, you may be feeling angry, sad, or perhaps resigned to whatever has caused you pain. Could it be that sometimes you aren't even aware that what you are experiencing is grief? Grief for the way things have been, and the way that this loss has torn that comfort from you.
We have probably all heard of the five stages of grief, explained by the Kubler Ross model. Did you know that we don't all move through these stages in the same way?
It's not a linear, tidy step by step process. There are repeats, jumps, loops, and restarts. Some move slowly through these stages, some move very quickly. There is no one timeline that all follow.
It feels like I have been stuck in the angry stage during this time of increasing Covid measures (again) longer than I'd care to admit. Acceptance flits by now and then, asking me to follow. But it seems that anger is the sticky stage that's easy for me to wallow in.
How does one move through these stages in a healthy manner? I suppose it begins by accepting and loving oneself through it. Grief is normal, healthy, and even good. Being honest is the first step to a healthy resolution. However long it takes, be committed to doing the work of grieving.
And I'm speaking to myself!
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I also think with grief we should never say the words "aren't you over that yet?" or similar words. Like you said we all grieve on our own time table and shouldn't be shamed into being done with it already. I do agree about the stages of grief too. And also even when you think you have worked through it, something will trigger it to start all over again.
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Appreciate your reminder that grief is both normal and healthy and of the wisdom in being committed to doing the work of grieving. It sure does feel like work in this season but I believe we'll find treasures in the midst of finding our way through it.
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