Life with Limitations

 We've all learned to live with limitations, it seems, especially in the last year.  Whether we like it or not, limitations have been imposed on us. 

Things are out of our control, life changes, and we attempt to adjust. 

It's been a little over three years since I have limited my diet to only eating low histamine food. Not by choice, but because the alternative involves a very nasty flare up involving rashes and swelling. I've learned to accept this change and, until I have healed from this autoimmune condition, I take it one day at a time and all is mostly well.  

As long as we are home, I'm fine with these limitations. It's when we are asked out to a restaurant, out to someone's home, or with others during seasonal holidays that involve special food, that things get a little more challenging. Actually a lot more, sometimes. 

Like Christmas time, birthdays, and other celebrations. I really miss being able to enjoy some rich, delectable treats like I used to.  Goodbye eggnog, Bailey's, whip cream, chocolate, gluten-full cookies and squares, ice cream cake, cheese and meat platters, leftovers, wine, ...  well, you get the picture. 

Believe it or not, there are some good things that have come out of my struggle with this condition: 

1. I am eating large quantities of vegetables and leafy greens, more than I have ever eaten in my life! My plate really is usually 3/4 vegetables and 1/4 protein (mostly chicken or eggs). This is good for my health! 

2. I have learned to cook up a tasty meal very quickly! 

3. My husband has learned how to cook. Because he (understandably) chose not to change his diet 100% to mine, we decided to try out the fresh food boxes in our area. He now chooses his meals most of the time, and actually prepares them! This is a miracle, folks. 

4. I do not tire of eating vegetables. I've tried some new ones. Surprisingly, I really do actually crave them a lot. I think of the Israelites wandering in the desert for 40 years, and eating a lot of manna, which God miraculously provided for them. But... they did complain after a while.... Oh, some days I do have a pity party. 

5. I often will take a deep whiff of what my husband is cooking, and say "Oh, that smells so yummy". And then I'm back to my plain jane supper (compared to his). Just smelling it does make me feel like I haven't missed out totally. It's weird, but true. Half of our ability to taste is due to our amazing olfactory system, is it not? 

6. My blood pressure is pretty well normal now! I have been on medication for about 10 years, but now I'm pretty well off.  

7. I have learned to be very grateful for both functional medicine and conventional medicine. Sometimes you need both. I don't like to take medication, but if it's giving me my life back, I will. I'm still working on finding the root cause and hopefully healing from this condition.  

8. Our bodies are amazing creations! I'm learning more about the importance of gut health.  Stress can do crazy things to our bodies! 

9. I have experienced the care of friends who go out of their way to make sure there is something for me to eat when I'm at their home (before the lockdown ;)  Even when I let them know I'll bring my own food (which is becoming normal for me), they will insist on preparing food so that I can eat it, too. I'm so grateful for them. 

10. I'm learning more about faith and healing. God works in ways we do not always understand. I believe we can be healed one small step at a time. A lot of time that's how it works, because He cares about more than just giving us what we want when we want it. And sometimes, the answers we hope for never really happen, but we experience His nearness through it all. 

What limitations have you overcome or are learning to accept? 

~Quiet~

 I lay on the exam table in the oral surgeon's office. I look into the masked faces of the medical team- surgeon, nurse, medical assistant, and anesthesiologist. I'm going to be deeply sedated while the surgeon extracts a cracked molar that has been giving me a bit of grief. I don't think I'm nervous but my blood pressure tells otherwise. 

The nurse hooks me up to an IV and also  draws a vial of my blood which will be spun to clot it; it will later be inserted into my empty tooth cavity in order to help healing and preserve the bone.  She also places a nasal cannula up my nostrils and I can sense a light flow of oxygen. Each step is explained to me. I take a deep, slow breath. 

The doctor asks me my name, who is with me to take me home, and other basic questions. He then says that I will now be sedated. I have a sensation of something entering my veins... and then ...................... quiet....very very quiet.... 

The next thing I remember is the sound of driveway gravel. Our car comes to a complete stop. We are home. I remember nothing else--my conversation with the nurse after the procedure, how my husband helps me in and out of the car, the drive home, how he wrangles my sandals off my feet, how he helps me to the bedroom to sleep the sedation off, and removes my ice pack every 15 minutes. 

It was just a beautiful hour and a half and more of ..... QUIET. 

Initially I was only going to take local anaesthetic for this procedure, but after my consultation, I decided it might be best to take IV sedation. There would be cutting of the gum, possible cracking, pushing and pulling, and blood. Um... maybe I don't want to feel it or see it. 

 I did not feel any pain at all, and even today, I'm almost pain free. Every once in a while my tongue feels the gap in my gums, and I'm in awe of technology.  

 I'm thankful that I chose the QUIET option. 

Photo by Etienne Delorieux on Unsplash

Have you ever been consciously sedated? 

This is my Five Minute Friday link up post. Do join in! 

Five Minute Friday:: ~Grief~

 Good Grief 

At this moment, you may be feeling angry, sad, or perhaps resigned to whatever has caused you pain. Could it be that sometimes you aren't even aware that what you are experiencing is grief? Grief for the way things have been, and the way that this loss has torn that comfort from you. 

We have probably all heard of the five stages of grief, explained by the Kubler Ross model. Did you know that we don't all move through these stages in the same way? 

It's not a linear, tidy step by step process. There are repeats, jumps, loops, and restarts. Some move slowly through these stages, some move very quickly. There is no one timeline that all follow. 

It feels like I have been stuck in the angry stage during this time of increasing Covid measures (again)  longer than I'd care to admit. Acceptance flits by now and then, asking me to follow. But it seems that anger is the sticky stage that's easy for me to wallow in.

 How does one move through these stages in a healthy manner? I suppose it begins by accepting and loving oneself through it. Grief is normal, healthy, and even good. Being honest is the first step to a healthy resolution. However long it takes, be committed to doing the work of grieving.

 And I'm speaking to myself!  

 

Every week, a community of writers of all ages and stages gathers around a single word prompt to freewrite for five minutes flat. Join us! 

Awe-full moments

The other day my girlfriend and I headed for the hills nearby to hike the trails. It's a place we often frequent, but as she said, "The views never get old". It's true. I never tire of them and I pause and take in the views, snapping photos (how many photos do I really need?) Pictures never really do the scene justice, though. 

Getting outdoors and into the quiet of trail walking is one way to de-stress, and bring a calmness to often anxious thoughts. And it seems now, more than ever, we would all benefit from activities that calm our nervous system. One of these ways, I have recently read about, is to intentionally experience awe. 

What is awe? It is an overwhelming feeling of reverence, admiration, deep respect,  etc,  produced by something grand, sublime, or extremely powerful. (dictionary.com) It often includes wonder, which is more about seeing something marvelous and asking questions about it.  Awe moves beyond self and makes us feel part of something much bigger than ourselves.

Why is awe good for us? Scientific studies related to neuroplasticity (how the brain can change) show that the sense of awe and wonder one experiences actually helps switch the brain and autonomic nervous system to the parasympathetic branch, which controls the functions needed for healing. These functions include digesting, detoxing, and balancing the immune system.  This means that by viewing awe-inspiring images, the body calms down. Our bodies can actually leave the fear swirl we might feel trapped in.  The more one experiences awe in one day, the more inflammation is reduced. 

Apparently, awe can be experienced in various ways. Intentional walks in beautiful places such as mountains, on beaches, or forest trails, prayer, meditation, lit candles, scents, and even silence cultivate a shift in the brain.  Isn't it amazing how science and biblical wisdom seem to complement each other, rather than oppose? 

I guess it's never a waste of time to linger in a beautiful space and enjoy the experience. With a busy life, that might be a lot harder to do, though! 

When was the last time you were in awe of something?